# The Repair Rite · Nine Rites protocol RF-007

Source: https://ninerites.com/practices/repair-rite
License: free for personal use with attribution to Nine Rites (ninerites.com). Share and quote with credit. Do not republish commercially or present as your own.

- Practice record: RF-007
- Duration: 30 days
- Stage: Forge · Discipline: Responsibility
- Requires: one witness

**Threshold:** From defended ego to mature accountability.
**Principle:** Repair is masculinity after the ego loses.

## Who this practice is for
The man carrying shame, unresolved conflict, or relational damage.

## Open the practice
Identify one person harmed by your avoidance, anger, neglect, or dishonesty. Not the person who harmed you, the one you harmed. That choice is the threshold.

## Daily actions (30 days)
1. Name the behaviour, specific, no euphemism.
2. Name the impact, their experience, not your intention.
3. Apologise without excuse, state the repair action, and do not demand forgiveness.

## The clean apology (template)
- “I've been thinking about how I handled [situation]. I was wrong to [behaviour]. I can see it affected you by [impact]. I'm sorry. I'm not asking you to make me feel better. I will [repair action].”
- The Unsent Anger Letter: write the full charge you're carrying; do not send it; extract what is yours to own.

## Weekly review
Where do I still lead with defence? What am I protecting by not apologising? Whose repair is overdue?

## Completion
One real repair conversation held, and the 24-hour repair rule adopted as a standing practice. Behaviour change is the proof, words open the door, conduct walks through it.

## Caution
Repair is not self-abasement or emotional dumping. If the harm involves abuse or safety, this is a support-and-boundaries matter, not a DIY rite. Nine Rites is not therapy and does not replace professional support.